I shot this wedding five months ago, and I have put off blogging it for a reason.
I do not want to write this blog.
In fact, if I am being brutally honest...I did not want to shoot this wedding.
Since the moment I met this couple, I dreaded these two days. Why? Why was I not delirious to celebrate the union of this couple of whom I spoke so highly in their engagement portraits blog,? How did things change so drastically? How did I go from adoring them to rueing their day? And most importantly, WHY would I blog about it? Don't I normally tell you all the wonderful things about this couple and their day? Why would I risk my entire business to tell you that I DID NOT WANT TO SHOOT THEIR WEDDING?
Because.
Because when I shot their wedding and today, when I am writing their blog....I am closing the chapter on my participation in their life. I no longer will be corresponding daily with the bride, giggling in anticipation of her day. No more will I wonder how beautiful she will be when she beams at me with the joy only a woman who is marrying her best friend and soul mate can produce. No more will I dream of the groom's expression when he lays eyes on her for the first time as she walks down the aisle of their gorgeous church, St. Charles Borromeo. It will no longer be a secret to me who Frank the Tank is as he will emerge loud and clear at the exceptionally beautiful The Washington. My last chance at having some private time with her ring, the ring that so captivated me months ago, will be upon me.
And I just don't want to let go.
I want to hold on to their memories, their memories that became my memories. I want to be there again when her father laid eyes on her and became overwhelmed with embarrassment that he became overwhelmed with emotion upon seeing her. I want to hear more about that infamous trip to Alaska, about the Easter lawn ornament that somehow made his way into another family gathering. I want to watch again as her sister and his brother-from-another-mother toasted them with the sweetest, most sentimental speeches.
And I REALLY want to know about the origins of the dance. The dance known as..."The Dance of the Chickens"
I talk all the time about the joy of being a wedding photographer but not this time. This time I am filled with sadness because while their time of joy with each other is just beginning, my time of joy with them is over.
Exit melancholy photographer, stage left.
On a totally unrelated note, I do do maternity and newborn lifestyle sessions, if "anyone" is interested!
Thank you to the incomparable Kelly Lisk of Kelly Lisk Photography for your gorgeous eye. It was a pleasure shooting with you!